Tyler Olcese is currently a senior at Livermore High School. He enjoys writing poetry and pondering his existence, this is his most recent poem titled “My Soul Slipped, Should I Show it to You?”

His description about the meaning of this poem is located after the poem.

Tyler Olcese, 12th

–My Soul Slipped, Should I Show it to You?–

Have you ever wondered

how it feels to have 

your soul slip?

to fade away into nothingness

which is also everything

all for none but you?

I’ve seen, felt, known it happen to me

or at least I think I might have

on a night like no other

I guess I could give you a brief demonstration

though I think it might be too messy,

and not for the faint of heart

perhaps you’d prefer I show it to you, but only if you want

through howling words and paradoxical phrases

that clutter my everyday peace of mind

–

A hushed room

blurred faces on figures

one by one they fall, blade turns

clearly coming my way 

drip, drip, splat, drip, splat, drip

shining, gleaming, glistening wet red swirls

sullen face lifts up to seek light

nothing is within reach except empty air

no pleas, no pleads, no pleasing the divine will help

one swipe and another then follows

the first goes one way, the next swing crosses,

pain is nonexistent to my nerves, too much, can’t process

all at once, never happened, will again, soon?

drained, siphoned into a void, blind, truly seeing now

existence was eternity until I awoke in convulsing confinement

–

The moon cycles through Night

and the sun has risen

but I have not

I’m perfectly fine, no lasting damage

that I could see right then

just kidding, I’m fine!

I did have plenty of burning questions however

and my solution presented only more

I went to Google, like a dummy

the internet says that death is good, when in dreams

representation of new growth and change,

unless you’re reborn, then it’s failure

oh, but you didn’t write anything about reincarnation before

a clever reader would say, and I didn’t, because

it would’ve thrown off my whole groove

–

Trees, filter light

calm Aegean breeze

shining sun, gold fuzzy glow

on a wooden table

a pair of glasses is resting 

square pattern, tan, warm cocoa

a bright cloudless sky?

no, a rich scent of serene rain

can feel it coming, a cruel twist from Fate

never arrives, all in my head

I’d like to think this life anew isn’t,

isn’t it though? or is it? could this be a Truth?

remembrance, clearing all my doubt

nothing, thus everything, will be answered

to get back, just have to wait, to slip again, once more

–

Not sure if that was real

or just simply hope

yes to both?

for with time comes the fading

my memories are modified

a true dialectic cycle 

finished with speaking for my dear sanity

 this mirror of self turns around now

fall into your own perplexity

hate, regret, pain, guilt, building up a wall, a horrid dam

you know one day it’ll come crashing, roaring down

so, alleviate your sorrow in saline waterfalls

chances are slim and possibilities wide, don’t know what’s on the other side

unsure if there’s anything, nothing except realizations on a circuit track 

just an ignorant soul, slipping through obscure observations

_______________________________________________________________________

Hi! Thanks for reading! This poem all started with a dream I had one night in which I was killed and is really just me getting my thoughts about the dream and some very odd deja vu I’ve been having recently out of my head. I’m not really sure why I chose to go with the format of expanding lines, it came to me and I was like, huh, that’s pretty cool, let’s see where this goes! Each time the direction changes is a different point of view, the upside-down pyramid format of stanzas 1, 3, and 5 are my direct thoughts and analysis of my dream, while stanzas 2 and 4 are based on the dream itself.  Enjoy the time you have here but memento mori!